"if you can walk,

you can dance;
if you can talk, you can write."

I just want to write tonight down because I feel so fresh right now: energetic and happy jackie is here. And I know it is because so many things clicked today. Things just went right. And I began reading the Celestine Prophecy for the second time and I think this has something to do with it. Re-realizing the First Insight, and how it is what I've always thought and felt my whole life and it seems like something that slips away if you don't think about it. Optimism, the value of coincidences, the acknowledgement of minor happenings that line up and actually mean something!

My girl's basketball team had the opportunity to step it up today because the older girls are on a trip to DC. And I watched Sonya play like she's never played before- so free and happy! It was wonderful to watch! And then in the second half she clammed up again, she wasn't smiling, and she was keeping her hands inward and fidgeting. I need to figure out a way to keep her open, smiling, having fun and taking charge! It was so beautiful to see...I knew it was in her! Well, we lost 27 to 9 but Nan scored 3 shots, and Violet and Sonya scored so it was a successful time bringing the 12s into their own.

And tonight I feel so open and free and happy playing soccer at the JWC. I played with Bright, just like old times winning the beach soccer tournament last fall! And Tony and Matt. We played well together and I felt like I made an impact, which is very important for me in playing with guys. I don't want to just 'hold my own' I want to make things happen and score and be a valuable player on the field! A new player after the games were over told me that I was a good player, and it was very kind to hear such a nice compliment from someone I don't know.

But let's get to what I really want to talk about, which most likely is the real reason I am beaming. Last week, when Carlin re-introduced himself to me, I felt this kind of spark like "oh, I like that he wanted to tell me his name." And I thought to myself, I would like to hang out with this fellow and get to know him. Then tonight he came to Swanky's afterwards. I don't think he was planning on going, but I thought if I didn't at least ask him I would have been disappointed in myself for letting an opportunity to hang out with him slip past. So it was Kara Heather Becky him and I and it was much fun! We spoke of Ireland, and skydiving, and singing, and busking, and traveling, and soccer (a bit, of course).

I can tell that he is a good guy, because on the way out and walking to the train he asked if I had my scarf. I thought it was thoughtful, and sweet. And when we got to 86th street, I felt as if him and Becky were going to the red line, but for some reason I went to the blue line when I could have easily taken the red. But hopefully that was a decision that was meant to happen. He said it was very nice to finally have hung out, and I hope that means we get to hang out again. And I feel like a little girl - but this can be my little girl diary for just one night. It's only going to be me who reads it anyways.

if i fell...